You will never scare me

This past Monday morning, I checked my email and got the email I knew would eventually arrive once I had started writing a column on LGBTQ issues.

The email from dontneedacceptance was essentially a graphic list of ways I should be killed for being queer.

Ok, well, that happened.

I debated whether or not to simply ignore the email or write a response to it as I figured there was merit to both choices. Ultimately, I decided a response was necessary. The reason being is that I figure that there could wind up being others down the road and I need to make a few things very clear right now.

You will not stop me.

You do not scare me.

You will never, ever scare me.

At no point will I ever fear you more than the dust bunnies underneath my bed.

There is nothing you can do that will cause me to stop fighting for the LGBTQ community.

In short, do not waste your time thinking you’re going to be the one that finally gets to me.

You really think as an LGBTQ person, I haven’t been threatened before? You think I am not already familiar with every point you could put into your hate filled screed?

You really thought that if you could come up with some super colorful descriptor of offing me, that you might just be the one to finally put a twinge of fear in my head? Please, just spare me your fumbling, hackneyed attempts to regurgitate scenes from eighties slasher flicks.

What I am getting at, is at this point telling me I should be disemboweled and strangled with my own intestines is practically cliche. Try to get some material that was not first done in an Itchy and Scratchy cartoon.

If you think this is a challenge, or that you know the trick to finally get to me, just know that saying you know where I live or that I will never see you coming, are also on the overused cliche list. So don’t even think of going there.

If you are still thinking you are the one, just know that I would love for the opportunity to perfect my eye-roll, shoulder shrug combo. Thanks to your kind, I’m already pretty good at it.

Write to Jeremy Redlien at Jeremy.Redlien@mnsu.edu