Let’s talk: being tall is tough

“Could you get something off the top shelf?”

“Do you play basketball?”

“How’s the weather up there?”

For anyone else over six feet tall, they know the struggle of height. The unbearable weight and responsibility of advanced personal altitude can force those afflicted knees to buckle. 

Too long have our voices gone unheard. Today, I am delving into the struggles faced by those whose vertical length extends above and beyond the national average. 

Before I do so, I should address the elephant in the room. Are these problems actually significant in the grand scheme of things? Probably not. 

That being said, complaining profusely in a public setting is more or less my job, so whatever, I am writing what I want. 

The first, and biggest (pun intended) pain that comes with above-average height is simply literally not fitting. Whether it is super short blankets that don’t pass our legs, or the showerheads that spray only shoulders and below, being too big for your surroundings feels like a direct attack from architects and interior designers. 

In addition to that, hitting your head on various signs and light fixtures is a danger that simply is not faced by the average and below community. The safety of us tall folk is rarely considered when pondering proper placement of pendulous property.

And then, the entitlement that comes from the short community. Do they understand the inconvenience that comes with being forced to get everything off the top shelf? Suddenly, I have to drop everything I’m doing, walk to where they are, stretch up high (usually untucking my shirt in the process) just to grab the Lucky Charms off the fridge. 

Get. A. Stool.

We are more than just our height, and we refuse to be used with no reciprocation. If the tall are to continue grabbing from the top shelf, then the short should be forced to grab from the bottom shelf. 

While I, myself face these issues, being six foot three inches, I cannot fathom the continuous questions that face our seven foot brothers and sisters. 

It is understood that there are advantages to having the curse of a height over six feet. Obviously, it is a plus that we are able to pull from the top shelf without assistance. 

But just remember to consider the feelings of us tall people, and don’t blame us if we ask:

“Can you get something off the bottom shelf?”

Header Photo: People who are born tall are faced with several unique issues that are simply overlooked. Perhaps they are overlooked due to shorter people not being able to see them from their incredibly low perspective. (Flickr Photo)

Write to Maxwell.Mayleben at Maxwell.Mayleben@mnsu.edu